The Ministry of Cropaganda Presents the Official Newsletter of The Knights of The Auto Order
Vol. II, Num. 22
The Auto Body Estimate Epsd. IXIV, Nov. '95
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A big Paul Bunyan howdy to (your name here) from (your town here). There's big changes underfoot at the secret underground lair of The Auto Body Experience. In addition to the smashing success of our recently-released second album, Smash Hits, it's my duty to inform you of personnel changes within the band. After over 3 years of faithful service, Tom Hambleton (keyboards) and Erik Fratzke (bass) are leaving the group. Their departure may be due to our grueling touring schedule, but I suspect the fact that they've never been paid may also be a factor. Replacing them will be Bill Scheer on keyboards and Tom Larson on bass. Bill is a soul-singing guitar/keyboard player who toured for years with the Johnny Holm Fun Show (really!), and Tom's an alum of Los Hombres Azules and recently completed a stint with Michael Hedges as his soundman. But wait, there's more! Also joining the band (well, he agreed to play with us - is that the same thing?) is Max Wendt on the saxophone. Some of you may recall Max as the rocking fellow who joined both us and The Crops at our CD Release Party in August.

We've booked a handful of gigs to break in the new band! Monday, Nov 6 we'll play Monday Night Live at KVSC 88.5 FM (and cable TV) in St. Cloud at 10:00pm Thursday, Nov 16 we'll strike up the band at The Bryant Lake Bowl. Saturday, Dec 2 we're part of an all-star line-up at the Fine Line, and Thursday, Dec 14 we're back to the Cabooze.

On a personal note, my dog, Gizmo, has recently found a way to sneak out of his fenced-in yard. The other day I looked out the front window, and there he was walking up the street. Upon inspecting the back yard, I could find no evidence of his escape route. One day Erik and I trailed him. It turns out there's a special rock in the back yard that Gizmo triggers with his paw, causing a secret panel in the fence to slide to one side, allowing him to escape. After winding our way to an unfamiliar part of town, we eventually followed him into an old office building, and to some kind of waiting room, where Elvis, Jesus, a pretty Mexican girl and some clowns were sitting in chairs, each reading their favorite magazine. Jesus flashed Gizmo a friendly smile as Gizzy trotted briskly though the room into the next. And there, to our amazement, he began to play poker with some canine cronies while posing for black velvet paintings. I guess two sessions of dog obedience training just wasn't enough.

I hope it wont require shock collars to remind you that AutoBody CDs, tapes and our swell new t-shirts make great holiday gifts. Even though we've gotten some excellent reviews, and lots of radio airplay (even on Classical 99 - pretty weird, huh?) we still feel the need to bring this to your attention. Please don't stand in the way of my bus fare home to Brainerd for Christmas!

Finally, in addition to the upcoming gigs, we've got new songs in the hopper, AND our free interactive presentation for the Macintosh is done! If you have a Macintosh and would like to see it, send me a HD disk in a S.A.S.E, or e-mail me at AutoBodyX@aol.com, and I'll let you know how to download it. If all else fails, mail me two bucks and I'll send you a disk.

May you all have a happy holiday season, unencumbered by cheese logs!

Scott Yoho, Grand Pooh-Bah, Knights of The Auto Order

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