All Your Friends words and music by Scott Yoho

As a kid you didn't get along with other boys
If games weren't played just your way you ran home with your toys
The documents have been released, the evidence is in:
Your dad paid all the neighbor kids to say they were your friends (x2)

Billy's red Schwinn and Mark's chemistry set
Didn't come from Santa Claus and they're both your friends yet
Your dad bought all your friends, what else could he do?
If the neighbor kids all ran away, he'd have to play with you

Mary joined you for the senior prom -- the memory's dear
You wondered where she got the funds to tour France that year
You finally got a job but then we had to watch you gloat
Wasn't that about the time your boss got that new boat?

Dogs are man's best friend - you thought your proved it's true
But your dad used to rub meat powder on your shoes
Your dad bought all your friends, he bought you a wife too
He probably fathered all your kids, at least they look like you

I thought of your sad affairs while going through my father's things
When I found a contract of which the memory stings
It seems my father had his doubts throughout my childhood too, and
Like your dad he bought me friends, and one of them was you (x2)

Billy's red Schwinn and Mark's chemistry set
Didn't come from Santa Claus and they're both our friends yet
Your dad bought all your friends, what else could he do?
If the neighbor kids all ran away, he'd have to play with you

©1999 Auto Order Music (BMI)

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