The Knights of the Auto Order Proudly Present: The Auto Body Estimate: Vol. II, #96, March 2010

Erik, who's now four, asked me this morning if I'd like to hear his duck call. I said sure. He responded with a boisterous: "Hey you duck, get ovah heah!" He even included a touch of Bugs Bunny's Brooklyn-ese in his delivery. Not only is his humor more sophisticated than mine was at his age, he's way smarter too. When Santa gave him a Hot Wheels car last Christmas he asked me if Santa made it or if Hot Wheels made it. Thankfully he accepted my explanation about the use of subcontractors. This is not a concept I was ready for at his age.

Perhaps each generation does stand on the shoulders of its predecessor. For example, I know stuff Erik's Grandmama doesn't. I remember the time she was trying to buy baby Erik a onesie. She Googled "snap crotch" and was surprised that the results were more related to making babies than clothing babies. I wouldn't have been surprised. Nope, just tested it again. Nope. Not surprised at all.

Peter, our one-year-old, is similarly way ahead of me. It's well known that kids his age are complete sponges - they pick up all kinds of stuff long before they have words. Becca thinks that the reason little guys' car seats have to be rear-facing is so that they don't absorb any of the hand signals, which daddies make while driving, during their most impressionable year. It's a solid theory.

Becca developed this theory while wedged between two car seats in the back of our Subaru wagon. She accepted this contortionist's challenge so that we could give Grandmama a lift. (Becca and I are starting to think that minivans are sexy, but that's a story for another time.) While in this position she noticed an eyelash on Erik's cheek which she caught on her fingertip.

"Blow this away and make a wish," she told Erik,and he complied. "What did you wish? she asked.

"I wished that my eyelashes would stop falling out," he replied. Erik's good at this wish business, as he proved in estimate 89.

Erik also hears better than I do, which further contributes to his looking smarter than me. He never gets lyrics wrong like I do, because he hears them right the first time. Well, that and he probably employs a little more common sense. I supposed I should have guessed that Rupert Holmes wouldn't sing "If you like peanut colonics..."

No doubt I'll get some of my own lyrics wrong on Friday, March 12 when the complete Auto Body Experience returns to the Eagles club after hibernating since January. While the Eagles club is charging a five-dollar cover these days, last time I checked that included a free drink, so it's still a darn good deal when you factor in the free parking and, well, entertainment. We'll play two sets, mixing up old material with new, untested stuff - so be sure to wear eye protection and old clothes. Please join us for the fun.

Love, Scott Yoho, Grand Pooh Bah, The Knights of the Auto Order

PS: Check out some vintage Auto Body video at our YouTube Channel

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